Iíve always wanted to walk into a room and have everyoneís head turn towards me. Not possible in the average nightclub where all the girls are vying to wear the least clothing over the most nubile body. I know Iím hot, but not enough to compete with a room full of scraps of material over skinny ribs.
At the bottom of the stairs the bouncer regards me approvingly. Sheís a big butch woman in a suit with a mop of scarlet hair, and I wink at her as I push open the door. Maybe later. The atmosphere of the club wafts out to greet me. Tendrils of hot, heavy air steaming as they meet to cold damp night outside, carrying the musky scent of beer, tobacco, sweat and dry ice. The thudding pulse of the music surrounds me, overlaid with a babble of voices: whispers, chuckles and cries. I drink it in, then stride through the door, letting it swing shut behind me.
My face is a mask of self-assurance and I own the room, letting my eyes adjust to the dim light as I make a long, lazy appraisal of it, left to right, right to left. Instantly I feel the flick of eyes upon me, noting the handcuffs, the crop and the easy confidence oozing off me. I scan the faces and bodies like an expert. No-one would know Iíve never done this before. Just a bored dom out for the night, looking for a little stimulation, nothing you wouldnít think Iíve experienced a thousand times previously.
The room is crowded with people, mostly wearing fetish gear. Some are dancing on a raised section of floor, others are drinking in groups, pairs or on their own. I note a slim girl sitting with some others. Sheís in a teeny zippered skirt and too-small shirt revealing the voluptuous curves of her breasts. She continues her conversation whilst shooting me an inviting glance and she parts her legs just slightly as she does so, tan thighs confirming the offer. I note a tall guy in a leather jacket with shaggy hair and the palest eyes. He smiles slyly and raises an eyebrow. But I figure heís looking for the same thing as me and Iím not in the mood for switching. I know exactly what I want and Iím sure itíll be here somewhere.
There, at the bar, checking me out but trying to pretend heís not. He looks a little out of place, black jeans and roll-neck sweater adapted for the occasion rather than purchased specially like most of the outfits here. Heís attempting to swig his beer nonchalantly, but itís still full and it foams back over the top of the bottle when he puts it down on the bar. He tries to wipe his wet hand on his jeans before anyone notices, but when he turns my way again and sees Iím still watching him his face flushes. Oh I like this boy.
I lean against a pillar, still at a distance and keep my eyes on him. He doesnít know what to do, unlike skirt girl or tall guy. He sends an anxious glance my way like a rabbit caught in the headlights then returns his attention to the beer bottle, picking it up and sipping from it too frequently to give himself something to distract him from the question of whether Iím still studying him. I know heís terrified that Iím not. Heíll sneak another peek any moment.
Yes, there it is. My continued scrutiny makes him both excited and uneasy. He begins to peel the label off the bottle. I like his eyes, deep cocoa brown under coal lashes just slightly too long for a guy. His lips are girlish too, with a nice full cupids bow, although his chin is masculine enough. His hairís black and floppy, falling into his eyes. He fidgets in his chair and brushes it off his forehead, but it falls back straight away. How sweet.
I let my gaze drop slowly downwards taking in his body. His sweaterís just tight enough to suggest nicely toned arms and chest underneath. Heís not tall, but pleasantly compact. I bet his arse is real pert under those jeans.
I wonder what to do. I could wait till heís not looking then walk over quickly so he jumps when I whisper in his ear. I could wait till he is looking again and saunter over, giving him plenty of time to wonder whatís going to happen when I get there. But no, I think Iíd rather he came to me.
I wait till the next time his eyes flicker my way and this time I hold his look. Before he can turn away I beckon to him. This boyís a living clichť. He has a quick check round because he canít quite believe itís him Iím after. He looks back questioningly. I grin and raise my eyebrows. ĎYes, you.í I mouth over the thump of the music.
He eagerly slides off his bar stool and walks across the room towards me, ignoring the crowd around him, focused. I stop watching him as he comes nearer and instead concentrate on the music, closing my eyes. When I open them heís standing a couple of feet away getting jostled by the people around him, scared to come in any nearer without my invitation. When I look at him he says questioningly "Um hi? "
"Hi yourself, " I smile. Then nothing more, Iím not making it easy.
He shuffles his feet awkwardly. "You er. Did you want me to come over? "
I leave a long pause. "What do you think? "
"Well, I um, saw you looking at me. "
"And why might I want you over here? "
"Well I hoped. I mean...í" I catch him staring at the handcuffs, the riding crop.
I grin. "Oh you did, did you? "
His face reddens again. "Iím sorry. I didnít mean to bother you. "
"Oh Iím not nearly bothered.í" I say. "Why donít you come a bit closer? Iím not going to bite. " Mentally I add Ďyetí and I can see heís filling in the blank too.
I raise my hand for him to take and pull him in near, so weíre standing a few inches apart, under the pillar and out of the way of the people around us. "Whatís your name?í " I ask.
"Well hello Jason. " I donít tell him my own name. "First time? " I ask conversationally.
He nods, numbly.
"Bit scared? " I continue.
Thatís all he needs. It comes spilling out. He says "I just donít know what to expect, I mean I really want this, but I donít know anyone and the bloke who told me about it couldnít make tonight, but I thought Iíd take a chance but then I didnít know what to do. It feels like everyone knows the rules except me. " He catches his breath and looks into my eyes and then down at the floor. "Iíll understand if youíre not interested, " he says "I mean nobody wants to be with a complete beginner right? "
I wait quietly till he looks up again, all hopeful because I havenít simply dismissed him. "You know, " I say, "we could just make up our own rules. "
"How about you do everything I tell you to do? How does that sound for a rule? "
His eyes register relief but with a flicker of fear.
"If it gets too much, you just say Ďmidnightí"
He looks confused.
"You know, like a safe word. Youíve heard of those right? "
"Oh. Yes. "
"Anything that happens that youíre not completely OK with, say Ďmidnightí and itíll stop. Itís a Cinderella thing. Try it. "
"Um, midnight. "
"There you go. Now, why donít we go somewhere more quiet? "
He looks shy. ĎI think thereís some rooms in the back.í He nods towards a corridor leading off the main area.
I grin like a wolf. "Perfect. Follow me. "
I walk down the corridor. There are fewer people here. We pass a door to a room that is completely dark. Someone inside moans excitedly. Another room contains an Asian woman in a red pvc catsuit using a paddle to spank a taller blonde woman in a short white dress whoís bent over a table. Clusters of people sit around watching, almost reverently. I glance back at Jason whoís also transfixed. I laugh. "Come on. "
The corridor opens out into another room at the end. The lighting is dim, coming from flickering candles in cups around the walls. The music from outside means you canít really hear what people are saying unless youíre close up. There are a few people in one corner trying out some gadget on each other and laughing softly at its effects. A male couple sit at the other end, deep in conversation.
I lead Jason to a quiet corner. From the ceiling dangles a chain with a big loop of metal on the end at chest level, perfect for what I have in mind. "Take your sweater off pet, " I tell him.
He looks at me from under heavy lids, full of desire for the kind of treatment heís just witnessed. He pulls the sweater off slowly and drops it on the floor. His chest is bare underneath, just a few dark hairs in the centre and some more tracing a line from his belly button to his belt buckle.
"Give me your wrists. "
He holds them out in front of him. His hands tremble slightly. I take the handcuffs out of my pocket and snap them onto one wrist. Then I lift his arms to the loop, pass the other handcuff through it and fasten it onto his other wrist, so his hands are chained in front of him. After that I slowly take off my coat and drop it by his sweater, enjoying his eyes on my breasts and waist and the small amount of thigh revealed by my skirt.
"Close your eyes now, " I order. Iím aware that the other people in the room are sitting back to watch and I donít want him to feel intimidated.
He shuts them.
"Keep them closed until I say otherwise."
He nods. Well behaved.
I step back for a minute or two, letting him stand there not knowing what is to come. His eyes move under his lids at any sound in the room and I know his senses are heightened, waiting for my touch.
Quietly I step forward and place my hand gently on his chest. He flinches at the sudden contact. His heart is hammering and his breathing comes fast. I move closer and use my other hand to brush the hair back off his forehead, tracing my fingers down the side of his face and then using the tip of my thumb to press along his lips. He murmurs as I do so and opens his mouth slightly, wanting me to penetrate it. But I take my hands away and step back again.
Slowly I walk around him, so Iím standing right behind. He doesnít know where I am. He cocks his head slightly trying to figure it out from the sounds. Another group has entered the room and they sit down a few yards away. Everyone present is now focused on what weíre doing.
I step forward so Iím nearly up against him but still not touching and breathe warm air on the back of his neck. He shivers deliciously. I take hold of his sides with my hands and pull him closer, tilting my head and breathing in and out several times, enjoying his reaction and the feel of the downy hairs there against my lips. Then, just as heís relaxed into the sensation, I grab the back of his neck between my teeth and bite down hard.
He jumps and cries out, but I hold him steady. His cry is followed by a low moan. He wants me to do it again.
Instead I trace the back of his neck with my tongue, up to the hairline then down again, then round and up to one earlobe. Again, he is lulled into that feeling and not expecting the bite when finally it comes sharp on the side of his neck, just beneath his ear. He yelps and jumps again. When heís still I whisper in his ear "Enjoying this pet? " and run my fingers down his sides.
He leans back slightly and murmurs an affirmative.
"Good boy. "
I let one hand remain on his hip, while the other lightly tickles its way up his spine. Once it gets to the top I dig my nails in and rake them down his back. He moans and shudders and pink lines rise up where my fingers have been. I alternate a few more gentle strokes with hard scratches, so heís never quite sure whatís coming next and his nerves are in a heightened state of alertness. I crouch down and bite hard into the soft flesh of his side, making him cry out again. Then I back away.
I stand there watching him for a minute or two, joining the audience of on-lookers in appreciation. I know that in the darkness of his head it must seem like an eternity of waiting and heíll be imagining the eyes on him, wondering if he can trust me not to just leave him there, the fear of that humiliation only adding to his arousal.
I take one of the candles out of its holder on the wall, then crouch down by one of the gothy looking girls sitting nearby. I can see she has a glass of water. "Can I borrow this? " I ask quietly. Immediately, Jasonís head twists to the sound of my voice.
The girl giggles and says Ďsure.í
I walk back over to Jason, placing the objects on the floor. "No peeking, " I command. He nods his head obediently.
"Lean back a little. " I take hold of his shoulders and push him back slightly so his arms are outstretched in front of him and his bodyís at a slight angle. His breathing is fast and there are beads of sweat on his forehead from the anticipation.
I step back and leave him like that for a moment, holding the candle a couple of feet above my own hand and letting a drop of wax dribble down and splash onto it. As I do so I hold the gaze of the gothy girl and she giggles again silently. The wax is pleasantly warm, like menthol back rub, thatíll be my starting position.
I hold the candle over Jasonís chest at the same height and allow a drop of wax to fall onto his chest, just above the nipple. He flinches slightly at the sensation, then smiles confused. He doesnít know what it is. I let my hand sink a little lower and allow a long dribble of wax to fall on the length of his arm. I can tell that smarts a little. I raise it up again for a few more warm drops on his chest, then down again for a longer splash on his other arm. He whimpers at that hotter touch.
I put the candle on the floor and delve my fingers into the glass of water for an ice cube. I hold it over the last patch of wax and let the cold water drip onto him. He lets out a sharp cry at the intense coolness after the heat. I squeeze the ice and allow the water to cover each of the pink areas of skin under the trails of molten wax. He turns his body towards the soothing liquid.
Then I drop the ice on the floor and take up the candle again. This time I hold it still lower I pepper his chest and belly with tiny beads of wax. He jumps and cries out, but arches his back to accommodate it. Finally, I let the wax splash onto his nipples, first one, then the other. He lets out two surprised squeaks of pain.
Taking a second ice cube I quickly apply it to the nipple that was most recently burnt and he moans at the touch. Slowly, so slowly, I trace a path over his body with the ice. Down his chest and across his belly, making him wriggle, right down to his belt so that a few drops escape under his jeans and he sighs and moves, hoping for more. Then back up to his chest and along one arm to the wrist, across to the other hand and back up that arm to his neck. He tilts his head right back as I smooth the ice over his adamís apple and up around his hot forehead and cheeks. As I cool his face I whisper in his ear. "Donít open your mouth until I tell you too. " He murmurs in agreement. I stroke the ice down his face and let it rest on his lips. He smiles. I let it stay there until it has melted down to a sliver. Then I say "open your mouth now, " and let it slip inside.
"Now pet, " I say to him. "I want you to turn around about one eighty degrees. Can you do that for me? "
His voice is husky. ĎI think so.í He stands up straight and shuffles round so he is facing the wall with his hands still in front of him but close to his body. He wonít be able to see the people watching him this way.
I walk around so Iím between him and the wall and say "you can open your eyes now. " He opens them and blinks a couple of times, adjusting back to the real world outside of his head. Then his gaze locks with mine. I hold it for a minute, two. He knows I wonít allow him to break contact. Then I say "you ready for something a bit rougher? "
He nods almost too enthusiastically and I chuckle, "are you absolutely sure about that pet? "
He blushes and lets his gaze drop, embarrassed.
I grab his chin in my hand and jerk his head up hard, meeting his eyes again. They are hungry for what is to come next. "OK then, " I say, low and steady, and I reach my hand down and pull the riding crop slowly out of my boot. He watches the movement with a mixture of excitement and dread. I place the side of the crop along his neck and cheek and then stroke it down his body, allowing him to get used to the feel of the leather against his skin. Then with my other hand I reach for the top of his jeans and pull his hips closer to mine. So close that he can taste my breath. I whisper to him, "this really works best against bare skin. OK for me to take these down a little? "
He looks at me in trepidation but nods his head slowly once.
I walk back so Iím behind him and put down the crop, reaching around him with both hands to undo his belt and his button fly, really taking my time. The hushed atmosphere in the room is palpable, at least ten pairs of eyes on the two of us.
I pull Jasonís jeans down to his ankles. He wears navy silk boxers underneath. Nice.
Then I take hold of the waistband of the boxers and carefully pull them down so his arse is revealed. He shivers slightly at the humiliation of being so exposed in public. I stroke my hand gently through his hair and say "itís OK pet, itís alright. "
Then I pick up the crop again and stoke it across that fabulously pert arse, enjoying the way it clenches expectantly underneath the touch.
Lightly I switch the crop against him a couple of times, letting him get used to the feel of it. Then I land a slightly heavier stroke. His moan is matched by a collective release of breath from behind me and I grin. I know that half the room is totally with him right now and the other half is totally with me. Itís an incredible feeling.
"That good baby? " I ask him.
"Think you can take it a little harder. "
I smack the crop against his buttocks again and he cries out. This time thereís a pink stripe left where it landed.
I lean in close to him. "Softer or harder do you think, for the next one? "
He doesnít say anything.
"Good boy. "
I pull the crop back and hold it there for a second or two longer than heís expecting. His buttocks tense and I let it land with a thwack against his naked skin. He yelps loudly.
Then I let it rise and fall again twice at the same intensity. He whimpers long after the final stroke. I put my hand on his shoulder as the aftershock shudders through him, waiting it out. Red welts have risen up where I hit him.
I lean in again over his shoulder looking at his face, he swivels his eyes sideways, full of obedience. I whisper "you know you have an audience donít you baby? "
His eyes register surprise. He hadnít realised heíd become the focus of attention. His face and chest flush.
"Donít worry about it, " I murmur, "theyíre all really impressed with you. "
"Uhuh. Now Iím going to give you just four more strokes to finish. Think you can manage it just a little bit harder again? "
He nods slowly.
"I thought so. Thatís what they all want too. "
I run my hand down his back and across his arse so his buttocks clench again and he winces at the reawakening of the sore nerve endings there.
Then I step back and raise the crop, higher than before. There is complete silence as everyone in the room holds their breath. My hand trembles slightly and I try to steady it. Now is not the time to succumb to nerves. I breathe in the quiet and then let my breath out fast as the crop whisks downwards. Jason cries out. I let it rise and fall a second time, slightly lower and he moans loudly. A third time higher up and he stumbles forward slightly at the force of the blow, but regains his footing and stands up again, a little bent over at the waist, ready for the final stroke, although I can hear his breathing sharp and ragged. He is almost at his limit. I let the crop fall one last time right in the same place as the last strike and he yells at the intensity of it and falls forward. I catch him and hold him up, standing behind him with my arms around his waist. His breaths are half sobs and his lashes and face are damp with tears. I hug him to me and he leans back against me, whimpering.
"Itís OK, itís OK, " I repeat softly as his breathing slows to a more steady pace. I carefully pull up his boxers, cautious to raise them over the painful bruised flesh. The cool silk must be soothing because he sighs. Then I pull the jeans up using the same manoeuvre and reach my hands around in front of him to button him up. His erection is still hot and hard against my hands. I let my fingers linger there a moment and whisper, "what do you say to coming home with me and taking care of that? "
He flicks his eyes across to me in disbelief. "Y... yes please. "
I grin. "Oh no, itíll be my pleasure. Besides, I have a lot more toys back there. "
"Alright then, " I say. "Ready to face your audience? "
He nods nervously. I duck down to get my coat from the floor, put it on and fish the handcuff key out of the pocket. Twisting the key in the lock I remove the handcuffs from Jasonís wrists. He rubs them where theyíre a little raw from chaffing against the metal. Then I turn him round so he can see the faces that have been watching him all this time. Everybody smiles and somebody begins to clap, leading to a spontaneous round of applause. I smile broadly and take a deep bow from the waist, then turn to Jason and make him take a little bow too. His face is flaming but he is beaming as well. Then I pick up his sweater and throw it at him. I stride away and he struggles into it as he follows me out of the room.
We make our way through the crowd in the main area of the club, out of the doors and quickly up the stone steps after a brief pause for me to exchange an extremely loaded wink with the bouncer.
The night is even colder than when I arrived and the air is damp and heavy. Thereíre no stars above, just looming, threatening clouds and I walk swiftly along the pavement with Jason behind me.
The tube station is only a short distance away. Once there I buy an extra ticket at the machine and we descend the escalator in silence. The train is packed with Saturday night crowds and we have to stand real close to each other just by the train doors. I make him face away from me and lean into me, his back against my front, my back against the train, wrapping my coat around us both so I can keep a hand on the warm bulge of his groin. As the train jolts along his hips bump against me and I feel my clit respond, pulsing even harder than it was back in the club. Itís intoxicating still being in scene surrounded by all these unsuspecting people.
We reach my stop too soon and I squeeze him, making him yelp. He turns to me, his pupils large with desire and I say Ďweíre here pet.í
Off the train and out of the station, the night sky is still bruised and pregnant above us. Itís only a fifteen-minute walk across the park to my flat. I hold Jasonís arm and propel him along, eager to get him home to continue what weíve started. Weíre just into the dark, deserted park when the heavenís open. Just a few drops at first, but it quickens to an angry downpour, drenching our clothes in seconds. For a moment or two I attempt to maintain my composure as the self-assured dom who can handle any situation. But fuck it I really love the rain and this is incredible. I turn to him and grin. His hair is plastered to his head and his face is running with water, he looks like a drowned rat, just like I must look to him with my mascara halfway down my cheeks. Heís already grinning back at me. I throw my head back and laugh, catching the rain in my mouth and on my tongue. "Come on! " I yell to him, grabbing his hand and racing for the hill in the middle of the park. I have a sudden longing to be at the highest point in this torrent. We run through the deluge, me in front, then him, then me again, dragging each other through the puddles and laughing and laughing. The hill takes our breath away and by the time we reach the top we are panting, bent over, soaked to the skin. Iím laughing so hard he has to hold me up, but then he canít hold it in any more and heís hooting like a loon as well. The grass around us is slippery with mud and we tumble over in a wet, grimy heap, him on top of me, laughing so much it hurts. Every time we catch each otherís eye one of us lets loose another gale of guffaws.
Finally, the laughter subsides a little, just as the rain begins to ease. Iím freezing cold, my dress sticking to my clammy skin. I giggle again, looking up into his eyes while the water splashes off his saturated hair onto my face.
He meets my gaze and his face is finally serious. "Midnight" he says.
"Midnight, " he repeats, solemnly. "Thatís the safe-word right. "
Iím confused, then panicked. Oh fuck did I do something wrong?
He continues. "I just wanted out of the scene for a couple of minutes. "
"Oh right, " I begin cautiously. "I think that already kind of happened donít you? "
"I just wanted to be sure before I..."
"What? I donít understand..."
But before the words are out his lips are on mine, hot and hard and cold and wet. I mumble a surprised response, but then I give myself over to the kiss as his mouth crushes against mine and our tongues meet warm and eager, desperately tasting and exploring each other. Itís the most incredible kiss Iíve ever had. I let my head fall back against the soaking grass and close my eyes, allowing him take me over entirely. Time loses any meaning and weíre the only people in the world on top of this lonely hill in the rain.
Finally he pulls back and look deep into my eyes, his own filled with lust-love, but of a more equal kind than before. I can barely speak. Eventually I manage "you know what? "
He shakes his head.
"I... Iím kindof new to all this too. "
He looks stunned at first and then breaks into a smile at the sheepish expression that I feel taking over my face.
I try to bluster over it. "Back to mine? " I suggest.
"Sure, " he says, his eyes still creased at corners from the secret Iíve given him.
He helps me up and keeps hold of my hand all the way home. We talk about the rain and how amazing it was, and he says he works just a couple of tube stops from here, and I tell him Iím a writer so I work from home, and he says his mate - the one who was meant to be there tonight - lives just the other side of the park, and suddenly weíre at my front door.
I unlock it and gesture for him to go in. He walks through into the hall and looks about my room, smiling at this book and that picture. Then he turns to look at me.
I raise my eyebrows at him. "Now then, " I say. "Letís get you out of those wet things. "